Peterson Toscano's A Musing

No surprise, Love in Action called on the Alliance Defense Fund (ADF), a Christian legal defense organization, to help with the "ex-gay" programs current troubles with the state. Instead of admiting they might be doing something inappropriate, they've taken the victim role and are now suing the State of Tennessee. This is harassment, pure and simple," said ADF Senior Legal Counsel Nate Kellum. "There is no legitimate state interest here. There's no health or safety violation, and there's no fire code or overcrowding concern. Love in Action's ministry has nothing to do whatsoever with mental health as defined by law, but the Department of Mental Health wants to regulate it anyway." I remember when in LIA we talked about the victim roles we often took as gay men. We were encouraged instead to take responsibilities for our actions, even when others wronged us. Christians often feel under fire by the world and as a result, often overlook the area...

Homo No Mo T-Shirt Originally uploaded by p2son . Graphic designer, Tina Encarnacion, has created a series of Homo No Mo Halfway House shirts that are now available through CafePress. The Homo No Mo Halfway House--It's not just for sissies. Get yours here .

Willie Hewe's Comic Art Originally uploaded by p2son . I can't keep up with all the great people and amazing conversations. While in Oxford I stayed with Sally, a former math teacher who now does volunteer work to help asylum seekers. Also, dinner with Jimbo and Trevor from GCN consisted of a full English breakfast (vegetarian style) and stimulating conversation that kept me up late into the night thinking. Yesterday I met Willie Hewes , the comic artist who created Free Z , a comic based on events at LIA this summer. In her home I saw her workspace, original sketches and some upcoming projects. She does the writing, drawing, and even grinds the special ink sticks she uses. These are handcrafted comics--expertly rendered with moving, meaningful stories. Over dinner (Chinese food) we discussed LIA, Exodus and the religious right. I reminded myself that these groups and the people behind them are not my enemies. Currently they may be opponents, but I believe in these people...

Focus on the Family (FOTF) along with Exodus prey on youth. For instance, they offer the upcoming Love Won Out "ex-gay" road show stopping in Boston on October 29, 2005. At the conference parents, pastors, teachers and youth workers train on how to fix queer teens. According to FOTF's Melissa Fry, The largest group of people who come are parents who have a son or daughter living homosexually. The next largest group are pastors and church leaders. And we also have educators and counselors attend, certainly lay people from churches, others from the community. (hat tip to BayWindows) Then armed with info from the conference, these adults go back to their communities to impose their sexuality on queer and questioning young people. As I wrote in PlanetOut some months ago, For years the Religious Right has slandered our community, accusing us of orchestrating a gay agenda that targets America's youth. They have claimed that we recruit and convert young people. They h...

oxford alley Originally uploaded by p2son . Okay, it's been raining over most of the country, but apparently this little patch of sun is following me around. Let's hope this keeps up. Yesterday I saw Miyazaki's Howl's Moving Castle . WOW! Very powerful. At one point, when one of the characters gets freed from a curse that had turned him into a stick figure, I burst into tears. The film says a lot about queer families and how some of us have to work harder than others to create a family for ourselves. I met with the Oxford Quakers for early morning worship and breakfast (7:30 AM!). I was shocked to see 13 people show up. Off to Bristol now to see Willie Hewes !

Oxfordshire field Originally uploaded by p2son . The weather has been perfect here. I took this shot Saturday as we hiked around the Vale of the White Horse .

oxford starbucks Originally uploaded by p2son . I just had delightful time (I’m starting to sound more and more like a British church lady) with Marigold and Geoffrey. She is a member of the Oxford Friends Meeting, a retired Spanish teacher and author . He is a retired Oxford professor (St. Anthony’s) and a Winston Churchill Scholar . We had a long and rambling talk about politics in the US, Milton’s Samson Agonistes , Pinochet, and James Dodson's Focus on the Family. I was able to introduce them to the world of blogging and wikipedia . In their sitting room I picked up a wireless signal from one of their neighbors and showed them my blog including a comment by Rob who met Marigold this summer. (Rob she remembers you and sends greetings). Earlier in the day over a lager I met with Matthew from Way Out. I asked him if the church in the UK does not constitute a large problem for LGBTQ youth, why do they have queer youth support programs like Way Out. He explained that in the schoo...

Christ Cathedral, Oxford Originally uploaded by p2son . Last night I met with the Way Out group, a LGBTQ youth group in Oxford. Matthew, the adult leader of the group, warned me that English youth do not typically ask a lot of questions, so I had to engage them with the material. That may be true, but once they heard about Exodus and "Let us Prey" (what I call their current agenda to target teens), they asked loads of questions. Forunately the "ex-gay" movement has never been able to get the same foothold here in the UK as it has in the states. Religion does not sway public opinion and policy as much as it does in the US. Still the number one cause of death among queer youth is suicide and plenty of young people need the support of groups like Way Out. Today I meet with Matthew at the Jolly Farmers , a gay pub, then tea with Marigold from the Quaker meeting and dinner with Jimbo and Trevor from GCN. Suddenly I have a social life!

DSCN1135 Originally uploaded by p2son . Great time with the folks from Courage. I have stuff to think about for WEEKS. Yesterday we hiked around the Vale of the White Horse . Really the photo says it all. I'm in Oxford until Thursday staying with Friends from the Oxford Quaker Centre . Tomorrow I meet up with some folks from GCN then off to Bristol Thursday to meet the expert comics artist and blogger Willie Hewes . Oh, and here in Oxford, they have a vegetarian pub !

At a pub last night in Guildford, I asked Jeremy Marks and his wife Bren how they were able to make the giant move from an "ex-gay" group to a gay-affirming ministry. Marks, who had been by Love in Action's Leadership Program, responded, "We didn't have that much to lose." Actually he did. As a member of the Exodus Board, he was immediately shut out of the international "ex-gay" group. Branded as a heretic, he had to go it alone. He writes some about the history of Courage , the organization he runs with Bren. What is so impressive is that Jeremy and Bren thought outside the box. Many evangelical conservative Christians live in fear of believing a "new truth" that will undermine their faith. As John Stott teaches, they "check their brains at the door" of the church in order to submit to the teachings of their pastors. Another amazing British evangelical who went from "ex-gay" to gay is Roy Clements perhaps one of Eng...

Saskatoon Jail Originally uploaded by p2son . Tomorrow is the deadline for LIA to respond to the state of TN allegations that Christian "ex-gay" program runs a mental health facility without a license. Some news reports and blogs mistakenly proclaimed the end to LIA. It is not that simple. LIA can find ways to skirt the state's requirements and legally proceed with their operations. Being connected to the two largest Southern Baptist Churches in Tennessee, LIA will most likely use the power and privilege of their church connections to get pro bono legal representation and may even turn to elected officials to plead their case. Forget about the separation of church and state. In a case like this, LIA will use every contact they have to find the loop holes that will keep them in business. I know lots of people hope for the end of LIA, but it is not that simple. Although they like to portray themselves as oppressed underdog with little power, Christian groups like ...

I spent two years under the care of John Smid and his staff at the Love in Action "ex-gay" program in Memphis, TN. I know they meant well. I know they wanted to help us with our struggles. Although they taught useful lessons about addiction and family dysfunctions, they missed the mark, and in my case caused more harm than good. When I attended LIA, there were always some participants who suffered from genuine mental illness. Serveral had been diagnosed as clinically depressed. One young man had bipolar disorder. Most of these were are on medications to help them with these conditions. We went to the program because we believed what our pastors had told us--gay sexual behavior was sinful, unhealthy, dirty. We enrolled in LIA, because unlike most "ex-gay" programs, it proported to provide a clinical, residential setting. Much of the language used by the staff sounded clinical and couched in psychology. In addition to being a Christian program, LIA gave us a therapue...

Well, I'm off to the UK for 10 days of presentations and connections with Quakers, Queers and the Queen (okay, not the Queen). I'm excited about presenting Doin' Time in the Homo No Mo Halfway House to the group Courage Trust , which used to be "ex-gay" until it's leader, Jeremy Marks, admited that no one changed. They are now a gay Christian support group. If you get a chance, check out my new site . Thanks to Roy Steele for the design (and the many revisions I forced on him). Also thanks to Tina Encarnacion, Sarah B. Miller, Scott Hobbs, Bob Painter, Jeff Harwood and John Humphries for their input.

John Smid and me-Graduation 1998 (above) & John Smid today (left) By now many have heard that Tennessee's Department of Mental Health & Developmental Disabilities determined that the "ex-gay" program, Love in Action, is operating two “unlicensed mental health supportive living facilities”. LIA has until Friday, September 23 to respond. If LIA statements in Eartha Jane Melzer's article are indicative to how the "change" program might respond, we may see LIA change right before our eyes from a clinical mental health compound into a house of praise and worship. Gerard Wellman, business administrator for Love in Action, and a former Love in Action client, said Sept. 13 that the organization has been in contact with the state but would not comment further. “As a church, we operate under a different set of rules,” Wellman said. Curious, and what rules might these be? What is even more curious is that according to LIA's site only one staff member ...

Jeff Harwood and Bob Painter, fellow former LIA participants, are pulling together data on all Love in Action participants who attended the Memphis-based program from 1995 to present. They have an impressive list that includes first names of participants, how they left the program and current status (gay/ex-gay/unsubstantiated). About 40% are unsubstantiated. If you attended LIA or know someone who did, please Email me and I will pass the info along to Jeff and Bob. In sharing of the findings, no one's name will be included, and your personal info will remain confidential. Please include name, dates in the LIA program, how you exited the program, and your current status. Thanks.

If you haven't heard it yet, Love in Action, once considered the Cadilac of "ex-gay" ministries, may very well be forced to shut down this week. B., a dear friend and a very clever lad (who wishes to remain anonymous), has kept on top of the Tennessee state investigation into the LIA program and told me this weekend that there had been movement in the case. Morgan Fox followed up and got the skinny on what is happening. You can read about it here . Talking yesterday with Morgan about the protests the Queer Action Coalition led this summer, I felt hope and joy. Young people, many of them teens, stood up for what was right and against what was wrong, and as a result of their actions and the actions of bloggers like EJ , the plights of teens and adults in the Love in Action "ex-gay" boot camp became an international news story and LIA became the subject of two state of TN investigations. At the bottom of each of his regular e-mails, Dr. Arnold Drake, former nationa...

This Bible story tells about a woman with an issue of blood . Well that is how the King James Bible delicately words it. What it means is that she has a female problem . In addition to her monthly period, she continues to bleed down there. (Yes, I can say the word , but I don't want to scare anyone away right now.) She spends 12 years going from doctor to doctor spending all she has and she only grows worse. Not only does she suffer from a physical infirmity, but according to Leviticus 15:19-30 this woman in Jesus' day is considered unclean. She cannot touch anyone or anything without making them unclean. She endures 12 years of misery without intimate relationships, with the stigma of being an untouchable. She has an issue of blood, but worse, she lives in a society that has an issue with blood and with women. But then she does the unthinkable. She touches Jesus; she presses through the crowd mobbing him, and she reaches him (as illustrated in the Jerome Johnson print above...

Fall Performance Schedule, The announcement of a New Web Site and the launch of a New Fragrance. (Okay, no new fragrance, I just have to take a shower.)

Yep, the most powerful nation on the planet even needs a little help from friends every now and then. Since I don't have a TV, I have not seen any of the TV news reports about Katrina and the awful conditions in New Orleans and in the Gulf Coast. My mom, who doesn't normally comment about the news or enjoys speaking on the phone, talked for over 10 minutes about the disaster and her shock that Italy is giving aid to the US for the first time. According to a CNN report at least 94 foreign countries and organizations have offered aid to the US. The Rueters photo (on the right) appeared in China Daily to show Relief Materials from China Heading to the US . Hat tip to Minstrel Boy for posting Mexican Army Convoys Bringing Aid to U.S. . In today's Washington Post, Elizabeth Williamson writes, Matching offers of aid -- from Panamanian bananas to British engineers -- with needs in the devastated region is a laborious process in a disaster whose scope is unheard of in recent U.S....

I added two little boxes on the bottom of my blog (see bottom of my blog). It's a little experiment. If you see any inappropriate or obnoxious ads, please e-mail me . Check out the ads (apparently I earn money when you click on them--like enough to buy a soy latte once each quarter--whoa! whoa!)

It really is amazing the things we white people can get away with. I just saw the movie The Astristocrats , a documentary about an insanely dirty joke that white comedians have been telling each other for years. (Not to be confused with the 1970 Disney cartoon, The Atristocats .) The Joke: A man walks into a talent agent's office and says to the agent, "I've got a great act, a family act!" He then goes on to explain the act which contains outrageous scenes of incest, beastiality, misogyny and violence with lots of body fluids and feces thrown in. After hearing the details of the act, the agent says, "That's a helluva act! What do they call themselves?" The punch line, "The Aristocrats." Now from a comic perspective, I find the joke, (and the movie with scores of white actors, mostly men, telling the joke in scores of ways) to be funny. Disturbing, but funny. Comedy is a strange art. But nearly everyone in the film talking about this joke, tell...

saskatchewan Originally uploaded by p2son . After months of traveling, I have two full weeks at home. This is the first time since March that I have been home for more than a week. This is my vacation spot, and for the first week I am doing NOTHING but watching Buffy, reading Virginia Woolf, looking at porn, taking short walks and catching up with friends I have not seen all summer. Last night Patrick and I went to Tisane for drinks and dinner. Patrick, a potter and a surgical nurse, spent his summer in a contemplative space, creating pottery in his home and at Wesleyan Potters , where he is a member. He showed me a batter bowl he designed. Such a pleasing design and beautifully practical. A lover of music, Patrick played me some Rickie Lee Jones and Liz Wright . Today I went to Middletown, CT with Patrick where he fires his pottery. After a tour of the place, I walked to Main Street to my favorite restaurant in Connecticut, It's Only Natural aka ION. I then met with K...

While reading Virginia Woolf's humorous and insightful gender-bending novel Orlando , I came across a section about dampness that speaks to me about the political climate in the US today. Woolf's main character, the aristocrat Orlando, lives a couple of hundred years as a man (without aging beyond 30) , then wakes up one day female. (apparently the actor Orlando Bloom was named after Woolf's character.) Orlando proceeds to live life as a woman (with some cross-dressing as a male in order to move more freely in society) and throughout the novel provides us with a satire on English society, writers and gender rules. Woolf begins chapter five with a description of a great environmental change that came over England at the beginning of the 19th Century. Woolf shrouds the country in clouds. Then comes cold dampness. Reading this today I thought about how fear, like dampness, soaks into the frabric of a society to bring about the political disease of fascism ...damp now began ...